POEM
By RITA NAND
Poignant and painful
yet grateful for that to be
The mask banished at last
A face of Grace
Free from woes and wounds
Liberated from secrets and shame
Celebrate One’s healing
To live without a face within a frame
I see You for who You are
The story behind the mask
This poem was composed from a challenging perspective, as it was written about a friend who shared the trials and tribulations of a sad life journey with me. Alas, she resides abroad and I felt that my offer of comfort and compassion towards her situation was subdued in depth due to our distance.
Thus, the inspiration for this poem as an Ode to her true character – her dedication to duty, her resolve to stay through the years rather than walk away and even today, live life with a face of Grace, despite enduring many chapters of conflict.
People seek recourse to a mask for many reasons.
Some attempt to conceal negative energy – a narcissistic personality.
Some seek refuge in a mask as a medium for healing a hurt heart, without attention or detection.
Others may seek recourse to a mask to preserve and protect their positive energy – a face of serene silence in the midst of turbulent tides that wash their way.
The poem sought to assure a long-suffering heart that there are people with eyes that see. There are people with ears that listen. There are people with minds that reflect from observation the reality of a situation.
Belief Perseverance
It is a life of torment for those who live a life confined within a frame and a test for those who walk beside their path in faithful friendship. The conviction of their conditioning – often self-inflicted from doubt and depression – is referred to as ‘Belief Perseverance’ in social psychology and sadly, a perplexing phenomenon which provides an explanation on why some people are protective of their initial beliefs.
They preserve their beliefs even when offered new, truthful and sometimes contradictory avenues and evidence to change the course of their life path. Indeed, it is a challenge to convince them to heal from within of their own accord and in their own time. Nonetheless, an understanding of the belief bias system is an aid to understanding their social sensitivity and delicate decision-making process.
The principal perspectives of belief perseverance focus on two key factors:
1. Cognitive dissonance – people feel distress due to holding two or more opposing beliefs.
2. Confirmation bias – to eliminate feelings of distress, people may neglect new beliefs that are not aligned to their current beliefs. Thus, they dismiss advice and evidence that can restrain and resolve a negative situation.
My friend neither sought professional assistance and intervention or shared her experiences with anyone, until our correspondence matured with time. Her solution was to seek refuge in Nature and continue to be the soldier on duty, as per her belief system from childhood socialisation.
I composed the poem as a personal initiative to instigate healing from within and hopefully, she would realise her worth one day to initiate positive change. Unfortunately, as time passed, I noted that the belief perseverance syndrome was so well imbedded in her personality that it was akin more to an infestation – waves of negative emotions would invade her mind on a regular basis to the extent that she withdrew into episodes of deep depression.
Before I composed the poem, I appended a card to my regular correspondence. It was a plain card with a message I only came to realise later, would create a profound impact. The message read: “You Are Enough.” That was the only sentence on the card. The response to me was: “Thank You.”
I was both surprised and pleased by the response I received because it relayed to me many words unspoken. She likely received that message for the first time in her life and after reflecting on her response, I composed the poem.
Suffice to say, she has chosen the path of self-healing.
Some masks are used to protect. Picture: WWW.PEXELS.COM/GMB Visuals
Rita Nand
